The Disease of Self

Today I grant myself the space to catch my breath without loosing my steam.

Why am I so good at coming up with an excuse for my own selfish behavior when I am the only one I asnwer to!?!

Today I will “dink”. Maybe tackle a few of the meager items on my long list I started this morning.

Tomorrow I will take the morning & give it to the gym! I will take the afternoon to fix myself a healthy lunch. I will finish off my day with the rest of today’s to do list! :) I think I can live with that.

It’s a rough start… I’ll admit!

Thought I would start the New Year out with a New ME! How could I possibly pull something like THAT off? Blogging my way through! I am accountable to anyone who is willing to keep up with my rambles, right? I have never in my life blogged or really followed blogs, but I know it’s something I will catch onto & look forward to, so be patient!

So a lot of you say that you like the old me, just as I am! Thanks so much for that, but I am promising to just be a stronger version of that “old me”. Spiritually, physically & by God’s grace…. MENTALLY! ha ha!

I have always rolled my eyes at New Years Resolutions. A “set up” I would call it! But after loosing a dear friend of mine in July of 2009 a lot of things have changed for me. First of all would be the realization that each day truly is a gift from God. I have also come to terms that bad things can happen to good people. And though everything DOES happen for a reason, it’s not always the right reasons.

So.. now that I have my noodle juicing with thought, I will blog!

I look to be “more” starting NOW!

I want to volunteer.

I want to get into shape.

I want to accomplish & create.

I want to feed myself spiritually rather than with rich foods & booze.

I want to treat my body as if I suspect God to give me many of those gifted days. I want to treat my loved ones & those I come in contact with as if I might be living my last gift.

I look forward to throwing my guilt & regrets aside.

I look forward to forgiving myself as well as others.

I look forward to pushing my tightly bound limits & opening my eyes.

I look forward to opening my ears more than my mouth! (this will be a huge struggle for me! hee hee!)

I look forward to this journey called life I feel like I might just be joining with heart mind & soul!